i'm. so. tired.
i'm too tired to even heat up some soup for dinner. i'm NEVER too tired to make myself food...so how the heck am i gonna record a whole song tonight?

i guess i'll just DO IT.



i kind of wish i could go back to art school again and study illustration and animation...take more sculpture...take some painting classes with teachers i never got to have...just for the heck of it. it could be kind of amazing.

and i just miss being in art school...which i never thought i'd say.


an artist's perspective

"there are so many people in the olympics that i'd like to see naked"
          ~my mother


*head hits desk*

i'm realizing more and more that i have no idea where any of this is going.
("this" being: life, people, plans, days, hours, minutes, seconds...)
and i'd better stop trying to predict and reason it all out or i'm just going to drive myself nuts.

and you, probably.





that is all.



i've been wondering why i've kind of had a constant headache, fatigue and sore throat for the past 4 days...but i'm not getting "sick".
i think it's just exhaustion...physical and emotional. God made us so fragile...and so dependent on Him.
that's one of the biggest things i came to realize...that He can truly bring me through things that i cannot do by my own strength. i know it's "old news" for most of us...but lately it's been made new to me...which is kind of great.



noooooo don't get sickkkkkkkk



today was one of the most beautiful days i've seen in a long time. i just wanted to keep on walking in the clouds, wind and sunshine...



please don't make your children wear shirts that say "i ¤ compost".


it would be better, even, if you dressed them in something that read "i ¤ garbage"...at least that has a contemporarily hip ring of irony to it. or people will just think they're into 90's grunge rock--but i digress.
you get the point...no compost shirts no.


deep breath

posting from my work station on my first full day at cartoon network.

God provided me with a month-long digital painting job that i'm scared, excited, and so grateful for.
and i get to work on a cintiq....which is AWESOME

here's to diving right in...



had a good, challenging weekend at a church retreat up in santa cruz, and got back tonight after a 7-hour drive.
saw old friends, marveled over the Lord's Ways, thought about Gwen.

now readying for the week ahead...teaching art and starting another new job.

God just keeps making life interesting.


"to turn head faith into a personal possession is a fight always, not sometimes."



major girl-crush.

annie clark of the band st. vincent.

one part angelic elegance,
one part tentative sweetness,
two parts hardcore rocker.

...maybe it's not so much of a crush as i just wish i were her.

(pictures taken by me--february 9th at the el rey.)



i get to see Gwennie again someday...
and my grandma...
and my brother.


life lesson #4

canvas boards make pretty good ice scrapers when you walk out to your car at 7 am to find your windsheild frozen over.


life lesson #3

nice soft brie on garlic toasty crackers is the bomb.

(well...this was a life lesson for me, anyway.)



well, my first super bowl party was kind of awesome.


once again...

i forgot how breathtakingly rad amnesiac is.

then one afternoon i made a long drive out to redlands on a cloudy day and remembered.


just thinkin

"i learn that my feelings about art and my feelings about the Creator of the Universe are inseperable. to try to talk about art and about Christianity is for me one and the same thing, and it means attempting to share the meaning of my life, what gives it, for me, its tragedy and its glory."
~madeleine l'engle


oh little one i miss you.
i miss you so badly.



200th post, people...woot!

and i would like to take this oppertunity to point out a new addition to my blogroll..."worked out" by carole holliday. a woman who is daily becoming more and more of an inspiration to me in her striving to be a better woman for the Lord, and therefore just a better woman, servant and friend. take a look...maybe you will be inspired, too :)

good try

my first period class i subbed for today was a little chaotic...just one of those perfect combonations of specific, difficult kids that make this job so interesting.
at one point, after telling one boy over and over again to sit down, be quiet, etc...i told him i was going to have to write his name down.
in all sincerety and fear, he looked at me and said with a straight face: "miss police, i really like the way your hair looks today."



i've had "single ladies" stuck in my head since saturday. attending a "mock the grammys" party last night did not help this at all. it also does NOT help that every teenager at maranatha is singing it in the halls.