DOWNTON I HATE YOU

HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

tonight

maybe someday.

cough

Sick. Sick, sick, sick.

I'm really really ready to be well again. in the past week i've had to give up much-needed work... cancel dates with friends i haven't seen in days, weeks, and even months... bow out of helping Joey and Ginger when they need now it more than ever...
kind of feeling like a failure at life (immune system edition). mopey much? definitely yes, i am.

These things are all just also compounding on other areas of hurt in my heart lately...

I just really would like to be well again, Lord.

BOOMBOOMBOOMBOOMBOOMBOOM

someone.

is having.

a RAVE. down the street.

BASS almost rattling my windows. people SCREAMING. WHISTLES blowing incessantly.

so exhausted. i was ready to fall asleep at 3 this afternoon. and stayed out til about 7 by the skin of my teeth.
i thought i was tired and depressed enough to fall asleep in spite of the nearby madness.

looks like...not.

i guess it's time for the sleeping pills and earplugs.

alivugber

well, i have another bad infection. again. doesn't matter what/where/how...i might as well have gotten it from, you know, looking at a tree! all i know is that my immune system is shot, and that i'm exhausted and everything hurts. today i start on my 4th (or 5th?...they're all running together) regimen of antibiotics in the past year. i wonder when i will just not be sick anymore. sad face.

regret

today i encountered a situation where i felt i needed to say something.
i sat, and sat, and sat...thinking of what i needed to say, but how afraid i was to speak.

and i never did...

and now i just can't let it go. the conviction gnawing inside me...
sometimes i feel like the most epic of cowards.

noooooooo

jury duty tomorrow.

arliufgva;rui

i hate hot. i hate this HOTTT. i also hate ants.

hot and ants need to die now...ALL DIE!!

itch i can't scratch

It's been months now since i've done any artwork. i miss painting so much i could cry...i feel the need all over me, like a rash under my skin that i can't get rid of (cue jokes about my hygiene). Lord please help me find somewhere to be able to paint again soon...and feel free to give me a kick in the butt to get me moving.

melting

one hundred and ten degrees.

owww

every time i see someone parked in our alley and there isn't a little white paper stuck under their windsheild wiper...a small part of me dies.

effing eff.

*really* pissed at the city of pasadena right now.

i can't afford to buy a loaf of bread and i get ticketed twice in one week for parking in places i've been parking for months...EVEN MY LANDLORD PARKS IN THE ALLEY DURING THE DAY, for heaven's sake! you better have given HIM a parking ticket!

yes that was me yelling.

alright

tonight my new-found unexplainable, steadily escalating and very disturbing tendency of maiming and/or destroying everything i come into contact with hit an all-time low.

as in it hit my car.
or rather...i hit something else with my car.

"winter"

it was too hot today for my sanity.

shudder

i'm sorry, but led christmas lights are just creepy. have you seen them?? i don't care how "energy efficient" they are. they're like ghost martian robot zombie christmas lights...they're all cold and unsettling and creepy!